today

...do not be worried about your life...but seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. so do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself...
sunday i turned 26. and maybe i'm starting to scratch the surface of what it means to live in today. some days i'm forced to because i don't know what tomorrow holds or next month or where i'll call "home" a year from now. God spoke to me more on this on my birthday. i sat next to a window basking in the sunshine pondering the past year. 25 was beautiful. i said goodbye to my dear mexico, spent time in texas and followed a wild call from God that has brought me through australia, thailand, and to india. this year will move me on to africa and indonesia and who knows where else. so often i find myself asking God about "tomorrow." often i have found myself waiting for the next big thing, being in a hurry to get to where i'm going. where am i going God? i think i need to have it all planned out, haha. God says "this is life. this is what i created you for." i'm here. this is where i am. now i am living fully for God. now i am living out what God created me for. today i am fully alive in Christ. my cup runs over. today i am walking out God's plans, purposes, and will for me. seize the day. it's a day to soak up the Lord and to bask in His glory. it is a day to share His love and speak out His truth. it's a day to rest in indestructible hope in an unshakable kingdom. may i never be lingering regretfully over the past or pointlessly fretting over the future. today is a gift. see His beauty and absorb it. today is full of potential, don't miss it! yippee! happy day!

My Jesus pondered...

born in a manger. died between criminals. ate with tax collectors. anointed by adulterers. served by fishermen. scorned by pharisees. sought out by the multitudes. opposed by the proud. pursued by bleeders and lepers and mutes and beggars and blind men and paralytics. born of a commoner. raised by a carpenter. recognized by demons. ministered to by heavenly hosts. tempted by satan. surrendered to the Father. rode on a donkey. washed the feet of His disciples. kissed by a poser. doubted and betrayed by His own. forsaken and raised victorious by God. tried and true. sitting at the right hand of the Father. interceding for the saints. coming soon...

Whoever receives this child in My name receives Me, and whoever receives Me receives Him who sent Me; for the one who is least among all of you, this is the one who is great.

I praise You, O Father, Lord of heaven and earth, that You have hidden these things from the wise and intelligent and have revealed them to infants. Yes, Father, for this way was well-pleasing in Your sight.

Truly I say to you, unless you are converted and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever then humbles himself as this child, he is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.

you will weep no longer

O people in Zion, inhabitant in Jerusalem, you will weep no longer. He will surely be gracious to you at the sound of your cry; when He hears it, He will answer you. although the Lord has given you bread of privation and water of oppression, He, your Teacher will no longer hide Himself, but your eyes will behold your Teacher. Your ears will hear a word behind you, "This is the way, walk in it, " whenever you turn to the right or to the left...isaiah 30:19-21

i have been pondering the gospel lately. the good news of Jesus. i've pretty much decided that Jesus was a genius. as i read through the gospels i see how Jesus could take any ordinary daily situation and turn it into an opportunity to point people towards the Father. the gospel is healing and Jesus poured it out onto the dry and thirsty land. to the lost, He said, "I am the way" and "I am the gate." to the confused and wandering He said "I am the Good Shepherd." to those drowning in darkness He is the Light. Jesus is relevant. He is relevant in India and in the US. His message is relevant in every age group, social class, people group, country...
Today becca, sarah, and i went to visit a woman we met in the hospital. her name is sunitha. she is hindu. her husband met us and took us to their house, and along the way told us that sunitha's father had passed away earlier that day. as we walked into the house we had to weave through crowds of mourning family members and neighbors. sunitha came to us in tears saying, "my father is dead, he is nothing." i wanted to tell her about the Kingdom where God will take away pain and death and tears. through the tears and the people coming in and out it was all we could do to tell her that we cared. becca gave her a bible written in hindi and we told her that she could find peace and comfort in God...pray that she will seek Him. she told us to please come back, so hopefully we can talk more about the gospel when we visit her again next week...
they will hunger no longer, nor thirst anymore; nor will the sun beat down on them, nor any heat; for the Lamb in the center of the throne will be their shepherd, and will guide them to springs of the water of life; and God will wipe every tear from their eyes.
rev 7:16-17

In spite of...

in spite of tears and pain and death we believe that the God who made us all is infinitely wise and good. as Abraham staggered not at the promises of God through unbelief, but was strong in faith, giving glory to God, and was fully persuaded that what He had promised He was able to perform, so do we base our hope against hope til the day breaks. we rest in what God is. i believe that this alone is true faith. any faith that must be supported by the evidence of the senses is not real faith.
--Tozer
some days i must will to believe God. i have to believe Him. i must believe that He is good, that His love is steadfast. i must believe Him to be exactly who His word claims that He is...slow to anger and abounding in lovingkindness, a merciful and just God. if i don't believe i will break. i find comfort in Tozer's wise words, that i can continue on believing God is good in spite of tears and pain and death. since being here in india i have seen plenty of those along with injustice and suffering and poverty and abuse and selfishness. when i see a mother toil through labor and give birth to a perfect little baby with no breath in him, my senses don't tell me that God is good. that doesn't seem fair. when a sobbing family brings in a fitting, expectant mother and then life leaves her, i don't feel like God is merciful. when a street boy covered in dirt and worn clothes begs me for a little coin, i don't feel like God could be just. but i will sit here and say that in spite of the suffering and pain that goes on in this broken and cold world, God is good, He is just, He is love. i hope against hope in a kingdom that i cannot fix my eyes on, but i can fix my heart on it. i can rest in who God is. it's all i can do, to rest in Him and trudge on doing my best to reflect this good God that i know in my heart to be real and true and present. Lord i believe, help my unbelief...